Friday, March 6, 2009
I love Rhianna's music. I have since she first appeared on the scene. What I don't love is that she took Chris Brown back and may have married him.
I have never been so impressed with Chris Brown. There was always just something about him. (Wow, my internal instincts AREN'T broken!)
When you made the song "Take A Bow", I fell in love.
How 'bout a round of applause
A standing ovation
Pack your bags and get gone"
(I have even been guilty in quoting these lyrics in a breakup.)
It seems as though you should have played that song for Chris. Any man (boy) who puts his hands on you doesn't love you. I don't care how "sweet" he is, or even how great in bed he may be. HE DOESN'T LOVE YOU.
As a domestic violence survivor, this story sickens me. Such a beautiful girl, caught up in whatever it may be about this boy, she could have anyone she wants.
I was about her age while I was going through the same thing, but I didn't have the support system or nearly the resources (ahem - MONEY!) that she does and I literally was stuck. At 22, and a new mother of my 3rd child, I decided I couldn't do that to my children or myself anymore. My son was 3 and I did not want him to think abusing his woman was okay.
I did go back, probably 4 times in 4.5 years, but I didn't get injured nearly as bad as Rhianna did. But after the four and half years, I had had enough. I pooled resources and went into a Homeless Women's shelter, and started getting my shit together. 10 years later, I work on a government installation and I have a Security Clearance. I'm not on welfare , I can pay my own bills, and even though it's a struggle, it has all been worth it.
In my abusive relationships (I had 3 - the one I mention here is my last), I fought back. It got to the point where I did. I had to. I wasn't going to let him kill me or think he could get away with it, so I fought him back. I know now that I should have gotten the law involved, but that in itself brings another level of fear. It makes the abuse worse. Hell, it even made squeaky-clean Chris Brown madder. That what calling the police does to the abuser - fuels the fire.
Now I see the red flags with men and I run far away from them. Am I perfect when it comes to relationships? Apparently not, I am still single...
But I'm not tolerating anybody's shit anymore. Whether it's that hot man wanting to make me his wife-slave, or a friend. I won't do it.
If you don't stand by your principles, you'll fall for anything.
Rhianna, lose the loser. You are too beautiful and talented to sell yourself short. You don't need him.
There are more fish in the sea.